Dear Diary,

They say time heals all things, but the situation with the kitchen dishes seems to have only worsened with time.

Despite my extreme patience, the sore to my eyes (and nose!) has not improved – quite the opposite.

While waiting for the problem to resolve itself, I’ve had to start rationing the dwindling clean dishes. Yesterday, I used a single bowl for three separate meals.

I’ve now since run out of bowls and am eating out of a measuring cup. (Desperate times call for desperate measures.)

Although it is a dire state of affairs, it’s not all bad: I recently saw some little black things crawling over the dishes, making bits of stuck-on food disappear.

They work their magic slowly, but there’s more and more of them showing up as the day progresses, so I have hope.

Until their work cleaning up the kitchen is done, I will just have to subsist off Pretzels, Doritos, and other finger-foods.

Fortunately, I stocked my survival kit with enough of these necessities to last until next week when mom gets back from vacation.

The initial intrigue of watching ants crawling around the kitchen has expired. I may have saved myself from physical starvation, but mental starvation can be just as deadly. If you don’t believe me, check out: Teen Literally Dies Of Boredom.

Pollinate: